Pulling Weeds in the DC Startup Garden

If the DC Startup ecosystem was a garden and all the startups were plant life, the good companies would be flowers, especially Urban Stems and Bloompop that happen to sell flowers. If the DC Startup ecosystem was a garden than the DC Startup Tech "Journalists" would be the farmers who shine sunlight and spread manure in our gardens. "Journalists" from Tecnical.ly DC and DCInno do a great job of spreading the crap. They indiscriminately spread life-giving nutrients to all plants be they flowers or weeds. That's great because every garden needs fertilizer. If the DC Startup ecosystem was a garden it would be a small garden and unfortunately, this garden is over-fertilized with poo and is infested with weeds. The weeds you ask? They are companies like Trustify, Chalant Health, Union, and LifeFuels, with "Venture Craptial" firms like 3Si, with false prophets like Paul Singh, Evan Burfield, Jonathon Perrelli. they are the second tier, phonies who don't even qualify to the 1st class huckster status like, Jason Feimster, Matthew Pugsley, and Janet Ridgely. To the outright abusive criminals like Andy Powers, Danny Boice, and Jen Mellon. If the DC Startup ecosystem was a garden, this garden would need a gardener willing to get his or her...

Jen Mellon is Unfaithful

Mr. Cranky opens up his mail today. And today's entry from Mr. Cranky's mailbag is from a first time writer who submits the case that Jen Mellon is unfaithful. I'm sorry fans, but Mr. Cranky doesn't control his incoming mail so once again we talk the Trustify Danny Boice and Jen Mellon story. What is Faith? Jen Mellon, alledged cofounder of Trustify proclaims to be a woman of faith. She claims to be born again. Yet all who know her intimately will share that Jen Mellon is unfaithful to her faith. Jen Mellon cheats and lies to her investors. She uses money intended to build Trustify for personal use. For a lavish life. Jen Mellon is unfaithful as a corporate officer to her investors. Jen Mellon abuses her employees. Jen Mellon is unfaithful to her employees. Jen Mellon is unfaithful to her husbands, boyfriends, fiances, and friends. Jen Mellon is unfaithful to her friends and lovers. [caption id="attachment_78892" align="alignright" width="385"] Jen Lies about her Family Ties with the real Mellon Family[/caption] Update July 6th, 2018: Jen is a social climber. She's always looked to upgrade. In fact, she use to tell people that she was part of the prestigious Mellon Family. Funny story there. Jen was at a...

Executive Coaches Light Bulb Whoopass

Sometimes I Have To Admit, #DCTech Isn’t So Bad

[caption id="attachment_60126" align="alignright" width="150"] Fake Grimlock holding a can of WhoopAss[/caption] When it comes to DCTech, ya'll, well, any of ya'll in DCTech who have ever read my screeds know that Mr. Cranky is a Glass Half Full kind of guy and that Half Full Glass is usually Half Full of Urine. Now, most of you are thinking that Mr. Cranky, is from New Jersey by way of Brooklyn before Brooklyn was as our President would say, "Infested," with hipsters, just used the word ya'll and you're wondering WTF so I'm going to tell you WFT, and TF is that the word, ya'll empowers me to say things like "Bless Your Heart," instead of the New Jerseyian equivalent which is, F$3K OFF! Hows that for some stream of consciousness bit spewing vomit (the first person to correctly diagram the proceeding sentences gets a free can of Mr. Cranky Driven Forward Whoopass as pictured here). Today I'm here to Praise DCTech and not to bury her. In the last 2 weeks, I've serendipitously managed to meet several DCTech Real Startup Founders. Here are companies that will make my next release of "100 DCTech Companies I Don't Hate." Nakul Manjal - Status Identity. provides powerful Multi-Factor Adaptive User Authentication by creating a...

Hear Trustify’s Jen Mellon Lie on June 20th

Yes I know I'm talking about Jen Mellon, the horrible human masquerading as a do-gooder and founder of a great startup and wife of Danny Boice. For my regular readers, this is old hat and you don't have to read it. I know, I'm a bulldog with a bone that won't let go. This post is targeted for those who are not regular readers and who may be taken in by the classy facade of the rotting Potemkin Villiage that is Trustify and it's leaders. There is a group of people, sponsoring a talk by Mellon and these people who are putting their reputations on the line. I can only assume they haven't looked behind the curtain. These sponsors are aiding and abetting criminal activity by seeming to endorse two criminals. Want to hear a bunch of lies? Want to meet a pathological lying sociopath in person? Then come and hear Trustify's Jen Mellon lie about all kinds of things including how she retroactively founded a company (neat trick Jen Mellon). Multiple people forwarded to me the invitation pictured below. Not because they thought the meeting was worthwhile. Even  I, politically incorrect Mr. Cranky won't repeat the Samantha-Bee-Type-verbiage used in the emails making fun of this event featuring Jen...

Indiscriminate Indiscriminator

My mother always told me that If I couldn't say anything nice, don't say anything at all. Then one day, my sister asked my mother to brush her hair and I said, "Jeeze Cindy, even Helen Keller can comb her own hair." To which my dad picked up his belt took two quick steps towards me and I beat feet out of the house as fast as I could. Only to return in under the cover of night when clearer heads prevailed. I guess that wasn't a nice thing to say. Obviously, the lesson didn't sink in. As you noticed Mr. Cranky isn't Mr. Cranky because his praise to pwn (pronounced Pone) ratio is like 2:9 maybe even 1:9. Now let me tell you I don't bitch about everything or everyone I see. There are many times, I see stuff I want to ridicule and then I say to myself, Is what I'm pointing out a warning and a danger to others? Will it be a useful lesson? You know, like a "Beware of Dog Sign." Examples: is this Danny Boice or Jennifer Melon, abusing employees, cheating investors, abusing family members or is this a Jason Feimster and his pretend VC 3Si...

The Danny Boice CollegeBoard Manifesto – @DannyBoice

Why was Danny Boice, CEO and Founder, of Trustify fired from College Board? For the same reason, he was fired from Speek, a company he c0-founded and helped tank due to his theiving. Because he's an embezzler, liar, fraud and cheat. Here is a copy of an email blast that was sent to a large mailing list of executives and employees of The College Board on February 8th, 2012. This document is just one document in a large dump of documents I received from a source. Four of my sources have validated the existence of this email. As I go through the other documents I received and verify their voracity I will publish them. The email, alleges multiple offenses perpetrated against The College Board by Danny Boice. Multiple sources have verified the email to be factual. It alleges many criminal acts of the disgraced former College Board Executive Director, Danny Boice. It also puts into question of the ownership of Speek Assets. Did the College Board own the assets of Speek? According to the document, Danny Boice's crimes include: He lied on his CV to get the job He pursued multiple outside business ventures using company assets, and on company time He charged outside...