Mr Cranky Superhero Not

Mr Cranky Superhero? Not likely. I'm not Superman, Batman, the Tick, Antman, or even Under Dog. Although we share a motivation. What's that? For the umpteenth time I was asked, what did Danny Boice or what did Evan Burfield or Peter Noce (or Jay Noce or whatever the heck this miscreant is calling himself today) do to piss you off so much? And for the umpteenth time, my answer is, I have nothing against the person, it's their actions. It's the damage they do to others. It's the fact that they debase authentic startup entrepreneurs. It's the fact that they burn investors, which makes it more difficult for earnest, hard-working, honest entrepreneurs to raise money. It's the fact that they add so much friction to a process that is already difficult. It's not easy turning an unconventional thought into a high-value company without being tarnished with the turd-laden brush of the conmen wantrepreneurs. Take Jonathon Pirelli (JP) and his silly Lifefuels thing. Jonathon isn't evil, he just has an inflated image of himself. He just makes promises he has no ability to keep. His ego keeps writing checks that his intellect and discipline have no ability to cash. He's burned other founders, many employees, and...

Trustify Update — Same Crap, Different Day

Here's a Trustify Update on what's happening at the Dumpster Fire, previously and more aptly known as FlimFlam, now known as Trustify. Many of the people who speak with me about Trustify, Danny Boice and Jennifer Mellon point to the surprising fact that these two initially seemed so "charming." It took spending time with them and truly getting to know them before they saw the evil depravity of the couple. That is the way with Sociopaths. Psychology Today Article, How to Spot a Sociopath, lists "superficial charm and good intelligence" as one of the first signs of a sociopath. If you read through the article, you'll notice is describes both Boice and Mellon to a tee. Trustify Update - Employee Turnover Since it's founding Trustify has been a revolving door of employee turnover running faster than a turbo-fan on a fighter jet.  Former Trustify employees are traumatized by the experience. They and Trustify customers are the victims of monstrous con artists. There are 2 kinds of employees who worked or are working at Trustify...

Evan Burfield Fail – 1776 Part 3

Welcome to Evan Burfield Fail Part 3, in which I will trace Evan's creation of 1776 to his demotion to CEO of Union (to catch up you can read parts 1 and parts 2 here). In whole these 3 posts track the rise and fall of Burfield or Evan Burfield Fail. In an upcoming post, I will track the Burfield Effect on the DC Ecosystem and make some predictions about his future. If you are keeping score at home: I predicted the failure of 1776 years ago, albeit they breezed past my failure prediction of 2015 I predicted that 1776 would be bought out by Benjamin's desk I predicted that this so-called merger was an actual buy-out of a failing 1776 by Benjamin's Desk DC's Mr. Cranky or DC's Nostradamus? Stay tuned! Evan Burfield Fail - 1776 Coworking In 2012 Startup DC, enabled Burfield to cozy up to the DC Mayor's office. Mayor Gray. As the Startup America initiative was winding down, Evan developed his plan to leverage his relationship with Startup America's, Donna Harris, Mayor Gray and David Zipper, the Business Development Director for DC. In a process that took place in a darkened smoke-filled room of DC's version of Tammany Hall, Evan and Donna proposed the...

The Rise and Fall of Evan Burfield – Part 1

How The Hell Did We Get Here - The Evan Burfield Story Evan Burfield is arguably one of the smartest people in any room. He's also proof that IQ points don't directly correlate with the ability to build and lead a company to a successful conclusion. 1995 NetDecide In 1995, Burfield was a freshly minted, 19-year-old, high school graduate of one of the countries most prestigious High Schools, Thomas Jefferson in Alexandria Virginia.  Post graduation, he skipped college and founded his first company, NetDecide. According to Burfield, he raised a million dollars in angel funding and eventually $20 million in total funding. To set some context of that period, this was after the big exits of AOL, Netscape, Yahoo and many other lottery winners. Everyone wanted in on the gold mine that was the World Wide Web and startups. There were 4 times as many VCs in DC who were 10 times more active and 50 times less discriminating than today's VCs. In 2000, Evan went out in search of institutional investors at a time when every kid with a business plan and a napkin could get funded.  Amed with a pen and a napkin, Burfield found himself a passel of soon to be out-of-work VC's...

Startup Funding: Who To Blame for the Lack of #DCTech Cash?

Who should we blame for the lack of startup funding in DC? Angel Investors - Let's blame the Angel Investors! Why aren't people like Mr Cranky investing in startups anymore? After all, wasn't Glen Hellman the #1 Angel Investor in the United States according to Tech Cocktail (tech.co) readers? Actually, no he wasn't and he, who is I, never was the #1 angel anywhere. He who is I, is (or am) also no longer an Angel Investor and the rest of this article describes why. Venture Capitalists - Let's blame the lack of startup funding on all the VC's who just don't "get it." Which isn't true if "it" is not understanding the value of a groovy app like Sick Weather. There is no it to get with apps like Trustify and Sick Weather.  The it that VCs do get however is the actually it that is the problem.  The it that is keeping them from actively investing in this region is that too few its have proven themselves to be worth it in DC as of late. That's why there used to be over 40 active VC's in this town and now there's only 4 or 5 or 6. The Government...

Evan Burfield Whispering in Sean Spicer's Ear

Evan Burfield… The Sean Spicer of #DCTech

The purchase of 1776 by Benjamin's Desk is heating up. As a result, Evan Burfield will be pushed out to sink or swim as the CEO of spun-out software company selling 1776's Union.  It's getting realer (Trumpian English) and closer. Yesterday, The Washington Business Journal's (WBJ), Andy Medici reported more details of a probable sale. His report kicked off by this Mr Cranky post from 2 days ago and additional sources. Good work, Andy!!! Quoting from the WBJ article, Evan Burfield, 1776 co-founder and CEO, repeatedly denied the news, saying there is no current deal or purchase with Benjamin's Desk. He said 1776 and Benjamin's Desk have had a "long-standing partnership," calling the combination "wild speculation." "We're always exploring different ways we can expand 1776's mission, but there is no imminent acquisition of 1776," he said. Today, after more discussions with even more sources, Andy reported the deal is likely to close next week. In today's article, Evan Burfield had his Kellyanne Conway-esque, spokesperson repeat the denial. Quoted from that article: [caption id="attachment_76106" align="aligncenter" width="900"] 1776 spokeswoman Morgan Gress also denied any deal or transaction of any kind on Wednesday.[/caption] (Note: Correction. The above picture incorrectly and understandably misidentified Morgan Gress in the above picture. Apparently, the picture is of...

Anne Coulter Safe Space

Safe Space Overload – A Generation of Wimps

What is a Safe Space? According to my google search: safe space noun a place or environment in which a person or category of people can feel confident that they will not be exposed to discrimination, criticism, harassment, or any other emotional or physical harm. "school must be a safe space for LGBT students." I support that principle that at-risk groups and individuals...