Washington Post Readers Dump on LifeFuels

The Tom Heath Washington Post Article The Washington Post's Thomas Heath is a good guy. He writes puff, feel-good pieces for the Post's Business Section. He's written about a bunch of clients, a bunch of good people. He's had a miss or two, for instance when he offered positive coverage to now-bankrupt Ponzi Scheme., Trustify. A company and two founders, Danny Boice and Jennifer Mellon facing multiple fraud and embezzlement charges (BTW, The Washington Post had to close the comment section because the comments against Boice were scathing). Tom is usually a cheerleader and yet in a recent post about one of DC's most embarrassing startups, LifeFuels, he's not so Rah Rah. In a Friday the 13th article about Jonathon Perrelli and LifeFuels titled, "This water bottle knows how much you’ve had to drink — and it tells your phone," he's a little skeptical. Thomas gives Perrelli, a noted embellisher of the truth the benefit of the doubt in a few instances...

Falfurrias Capital Partners acquires majority interest in DCTech company Industry Dive

Congratulations to the co-founders, CEO Sean Griffey (pictured above), CRO Ryan Willumson, CTO Eli Dickinson and the entire Industry Dive team, the best little company that DCInno never heard of. Industry Dive announced today that Falfurrias Capital Partners acquired a majority stake in the DC-based company. According to the company,  Industry Dive, "provides premium business news, original analysis, and other information products and services to more than 7 million executives across 19 industry verticals ranging from banking and supply chain to retail and waste." Founded 7 years ago, in 2012, Industry Dive started with a $900 thousand capital infusion by the founders and a small group of local Angels. Angels contributed $400 thousand in an initial seed round. That round was followed by another $250 thousand in equity and $250 thousand in convertible debt. The Washington Business Journal reported 2018 revenues as "roughly $22 million." The company's acquisition press release states, "Industry Dive's three-year growth rate of 348% placed the company in the top half of the Deloitte Technology Fast 500 and earned it a ranking as the 13th fastest-growing media company on the 2019 Inc. 5000 list. The company also has been recognized three years in a row as a top workplace by the Washington Post, and has...

Is Jonathon Perrelli’s LifeFuels About To Become a Company?

(Updated 5:51 PM August 29, 2019) Hallelujah, Jonathon Perrelli! Yes! Yes! Yesssssssss! It's happy days for LifeFuels investors. According to an article first reported by Andy Medici in the  Washington Business Journal, Jonathon Perrelli's, LifeFuels will be shipping product at some yet to be identified mythical time in the not so distant near future like perhaps some time on some unspecified day this September...

LifeFuels Moonshot

In 1962, a young, charismatic President Kennedy announced an ambitious plan. "First, I believe that this nation should commit itself to achieving the goal, before this decade is out, of landing a man on the moon and returning him safely to the Earth." John F. Kennedy, September 12 1962 Seven years later, Kennedy was not with us to hear these famous words. "That's one small step for man, one giant leap for mankind." Niel Armstrong, July, 20 1969 It was an ambitious plan. In fact, to this day, ambitious plans are often called moon shots. By setting an ambitious goal, American scientists and engineers pushed the envelope of science. Kennedy's dream was realized. In 2014, a bombastic, charismatic, buffoonish "entrepreneur," Jonathon Perrelli announced his slightly less ambitious Moon Shot. "First, I beleive that this company should commit istelf to acheiving the goal, before this decade is out, of making a water bottle and avoid the hoots and howls of Mr. Cranky." Jonathon Perrelli, April Fools Day, 2014 More than Five years later, just nipping under the wire of the end of the decade, LifeFuels Announces, "We're kicking off our Pilot Program on June 12th." LifeFuels Yes according to an email from LifeFuels, Dear LifeFueler Subject: Pilot Program Details You will be provided with a Bottle,...

Morally Bankrupt Communiclique Declared Financially Bankrupt

This Morning, in a Deleware Court, Communiclique declared financially bankrupt by a judge. Communiclique (AKA Clique & CliqueAPI) CEO, Founder and Board Member, Andy Powers did not show up in court as the judge had ordered. Based on the fraudulent evidence, the judge referred Andy Powers to the US Attorney's office on criminal charges. Game On! Or Game Off! Or where the hell was Andy Powers? Let the Games Begin! In addition, the judge declared Andy Powers, big shot, big-time business guy, master of the universe, financially bankrupt...

The This of the Thats

There are more than a few overdone phrases in the startup world that drive me nuts. I hate the intersections as in we're at the intersection,  "we're  at the intersection of tech and sustainability," courtesy of the Shelton Group, or "we're at the intersection of absurdity and buffoonery," courtesy of LifeFuels. Or how about, "We're the Tinder of Uber (for people who want to date Uber Drivers). But nothing makes me crazier than the "We are the This of the Thats." But before I get to that, I have this great product idea! I'm talking as good as the 3rd Love Bra or the Stupid Socks that come in shoe sizes instead of small, medium-large. Here's my idea, it's the 3rd Love Bra of Socks. Shoes come in Left and Right...

DCTech Startup Crime Update

It's that time again for the DCTech Startup Crime Update. Lots of little movement with the Crooks and Criminals of DCTech but not enough to warrant a single subject blog and therefore I'm going to provide a general DCTech Startup Crime Update on multiple happenings around DCTech. DCTech Startup Crime Update -Existing Projects Andy Powers and Communiclique (Clique, CliqueAPI) - Every month that Andy doesn't live rent-free on the federally funded 3 hots and a cot program, costs his investors a ton of evaporating capital including the $35 thousand per month rent on his home (see home and court details).  On Monday 4/29, Andy Power's lawyer showed up just prior to the 4 PM deadline with the data to prove that the company was a legitimate business. The invoices submitted were obviously fraudulent...

Retail Tectonic Shifts and a few Yuks

Retail Tectonic Shifts? Is Mr. Cranky going to talk about what's happening in Germany? No that's Teutonic Shifts.  This is the kind of shirt that takes place when the earth's floating tectonic plates mash together and shake the world. Shit is happening in retail. Some of it good. Most of it bad. In this post, true to form, Mr. Cranky briefly touches on the good but will hammer home the bad effects of retail tectonic shifts. Amazon - Retail Tectonic Shifts Amazon - The Good: Have a stupid idea in your head and search it on Amazon and there it is...