Bad Spam, Bad Marketing

Talk about bad marketing! Usually, Mr Cranky just ignores his spam mail. Occasionally, I lie to draw a lesson from them so I've decided to improve the following spam mail and send it to the spammer so that old Mak Saini...

DCs Mr Cranky

Why Do They Call Me DC’s Mr Cranky?

DC's Mr Cranky? Tonight, for the umpteenth time I was introduced as DC's Mr Cranky. Tonight, folks continuously asked, "Why Mr Cranky?" I obviously wasn't amongst my base. They didn't know me. So I thought today, I'd explain to the world...

Mr Cranky Startup Technology Resolution

Mr Cranky’s 2017 Startup Technology Resolution

Mr Cranky and Startup Technology a match made in heaven. Mr Cranky's back and I've made my 2017 Startup Technology Resolution list for the coming year. For the past 2 years I've fortunately avoided the crank inducing bullshitocracy that is the DC Tech Startup ecosystem. I've been able to avoid the Faux Silicon Valley wannabe wantrepreneur festival celebrations of  stupid ideas, poorly executed and horribly explained. Then recently, with a slight case of FOMO a work assignment thrust me headfirst back into the ooze of DCs anemic startup ecosystem. So here's my resolution for 2017. I will not get upset when I see what I saw these past few months. What did I see, you say? Here goes: Yet Another Better Yelp - You know what's wrong with Yelp? It is widely used, casts a wide net, covering too many restaurants and other service providers with hundreds of reviews. What this world needs is a Yelp for dating. You see a Yelp-like app with far fewer entries, painfully and expensively self-sourced with an awesome ambiance filter that empowers couples to choose their date venue based on micro-targeted ambiance features...

You’re Right I Suck

The other day, I received another post comments (I get like 10 a month) reminding me what many of my poor tortured teachers in grade school and high school use to drill into me…. I’m a mentally challenged idiot who will never amount to anything. I know… I know.. they were prophets. But they didn’t have to be so mean about it. Back to my latest blog critic. This week a blog commenter brought me back to Ms Hockberg's 3rd grade class. It wasn't that he was cruel.  in fact I think he was trying to be helpful when he gave me a both a compliment and a grammar lesson that went like so: Outstanding content but you need to learn how apostrophes are used. Running a spell-check program will help. hypotheses -- no apostrophe needed. One hypothesis. Two hypotheses. . . . show me that your willing . . " Should be you're. You + are = you're." . . . other people who's judgment I trust . . ." Should be whose. Who's = who + is." . . . bet on the company based on it's risk . . . " Should be its. Its indicates possession. It's = it + is." He went on...

A Startup Founder Rants

The other day I witnessed a startup founder going totally Mr Cranky in a Facebook Group. I loved the rant so I asked and recieved permission to reprint this...