Blockchain Blockheads

It happened with Crowd Funding, it happened with Beanie Babies, it happened with Tulips and it’s happening now with cryptocurrency and blockchain. Whenever there is a new “Big Thing.” Whenever it’s going to be the “Next Big Thing.” There’s a group of know-next-to-nothings, willing to monetize a know-nothing’s greed in order to profit from shit they do not understand.

Now I’m not saying Blockchain isn’t going to be big. I think it’s going to be HUGE! I’m talking HUGE with a silent H. Yet, when there is a gold rush, there is a rush for charlatans to insert themselves between the greedy and their wallets.

You can tell when a market is heating up with grifters when there are more conferences on the market then there are marketeers. Take the recent deluge of Blockchain conferences booking any speaker who can spell blokchain (which leaves me out and thus why I’m ranting here) filling the stage with myopic one-eyed men (which is an expression that leaves out one-eyed women or even the more woke one-eyed-they) that rush into these nascent (which is a word that I have no idea what it means but man doesn’t it make me sound smart) in an effort to fleece the blind (see this post).

Now sometimes, these next-big-things are the next-big-duds like Computer Aided Software Engineering or CASE, the next-big-dud of the 90s. Big names like former Vikings QB, Fran Tarkenton ran a huge CASE con game called Knowlegeware (remind me to tell you the stories I’ve heard about Tarkenton forcing his senior execs to allow him to have sex with their wives if they wanted to keep their jobs). Tarkenton later went on to further disgrace his legacy by endorsing many other conmen including charlatan fakes like Tony Robbins (I call fake based on inside baseball knowledge gained from a former coaching client of mine who was a former Senior Exec of the Robbins’ organization that resigned and walked away from the company leaving a ton of cash behind because there wasn’t enough bleach and soup to clean the stink off of him every day he finished work).

So remember 5 years ago, when everyone was going to get rich on crowdfunding? Who got rich? No really, I don’t have the answer, who? Do you know anyone who got wealthy by somehow legitimately monetizing the crowdfunding craze (note: monetizing Crowdfunding Conference for the losers who thought they were going to get rich from Crowdfunding doesn’t count)?

So if you’re keeping score at home, so far, Mr. Cranky has included 8 parentheticals and opined on the following subjects:

  1. Blockchain
  2. Crypto Currencies
  3. Tulips
  4. Beanie Babies
  5. NFL Quarterbacks
  6. CASE
  7. Fran Tarkenton
  8. Sex Scandals
  9. Tony Robbins
  10. Crowd Funding
  11. Vocabulary Expansion (Nascent)
  12. Gender Identification

But now I’m going to get back to the point and the point is… Blockchain. As soon as someone mentions blockchain to you, grab your wallet and run! Got it?